Another Sleepless Night

I hear the rain outside and I wonder if that's what my heartbeat sounds like.
I sit up in bed praying for sleep for a tired body and an overactive mind.
I wonder if my body is getting ready for many more sleepless nights.
You are your momma's child.
You squirm and toss and turn just like her
Waiting, waiting, watching the clock, watching your daddy.
You've been nestled right next to my heart for what seems like forever.
I don't want to let you go.
Such a paradox.
I can't wait to hold you in my arms, yet my heart aches with loneliness at the thought that you wont be there to listen to it.
I guess this is to be my first lesson in motherhood.
Learning to let you go while aching to keep you close.